Barrie (creator of Peter Pan), this challenging monologue proves a unique pick.

For many performers, much of that pre-audition anxiety comes in the form of choosing a well-suited monologue.

Just like every actress, every monologue brings something new to the table especially when it comes to comedy.

This witty monologue, from the acclaimed musical, A Chorus Line, denotes one dancers darkly comedic journey to the Broadway stage.

See, I never heard about The Red Shoes, I never saw The Red Shoes, I didnt give a fu about The Red Shoes.

I decided to be a Rockette because this girl in my home town Louella Heiner had actually gotten out and made it in New York.

Well, she came home one Christmas to visit, and they gave her a parade.

A goddamn parade I twirled a friggin baton for two hours in the rain.

That was my plan.

New York, New York.

Except I had one minor problem.

Get the picture Anyway, I got off this bus in my little white shoes, my little white tights, little white dress, my little ugly face, and my long blonde hair which was natural then.

I looked like a fucking nurse I had 87 dollars in my pocket and seven years of tap and acrobatics.

I could do a hundred and eighty degree split and come up tapping the Morse Code.

Well, with that kind of talent I figured the Mayor would be waiting for me at Port Authority.

I showed up at the Music Hall with my red patent leather tap shoes.

And this man said to me: Can you do fankicks Well, sure I could do terrific fankicks.

Of course, what he was trying to tell me wasit was the way I looked, not the fankicks.

So I said: Fuck you, Radio City and the Rockettes Im gonna make on Broadway.

Dotty is not only a principal investor in the plays production but cherishes the role of Mrs.

Clackett, a gossipy housekeeper.

Ive only got one pair of feet.

Hello. Yes, but theres no one here, love.

No, Mr. Brents not hereHe lives here, yes, but he dont live here now because he lives in Spain Mr.

Philip Brent, thats right.

The one who writes the plays, thats him, only now he writes them in Spain No, shes in Spain, too, theyre all in Spain, theres no one here Am I in Spain No, Im not in Spain, dear.

I look after the house for him, but I go home at one oclock on Wednesday, only Ive got a nice plate of sardines to put my feet up with, because its the royal whats-its called on the telly the royal you know wheres the paper, then And if its to do with letting the house then youll have to ring the house-agents, because theyre the agents for the house.

Squire Squire, Hackham and whos the other one No, theyre not in Spain, theyre next to the phone in the study.

Soon as you take the weight off your feet, down it all comes on your head.

Best Comedic Monologues Women